Bloglander

Not a lot to recommend among opening films this week, except the Sundance Grand Jury Prize-winning Winter's Bone (see bottom) and the sweet, cute Nanny McPhee followup. And of course, if you're a Stieg Larssonophile, you'll absolutely have to see The Girl Who Played With Fire

OPENING FILMS

The Girl Who Played With Fire
Stieg Larsson’s super-hacker Lisbeth Salander is back and at the center of some deep Swedish intrigue. Mafiosi and the secret police have been conspiring since her birth, it seems, to shut this tiny dynamo up. Her super-reporter-sometime-love-interest is involved, too, initially because someone kills his star reporter and later because, as he says, “I owe [Lisbeth] that much.” It’s all good fun, but you get the sense that the film needs the book to feel totally complete, and thus we can’t totally recommend it. At Magic Lantern. (LB) Rated R Showtimes

Lottery Ticket
Bow Wow (who hasn’t been Lil since 2002) just won the lottery, but unfortunately it’s the Fourth of July weekend — all state offices are closed. What’s a newly minted millionaire to do? Why, be conned by all manner of shysters and go on a shopping spree, of course! It’s the American way, or something. But not to worry: Ice Cube, the patron saint of movies with one-joke premises, swoops in to save the day. (DH) Rated PG-13Showtimes

Nanny McPhee Returns
It’s earthy farm kids versus snooty city kids in a whimsical 1940ish English-countryside setting ... until magical Nanny McPhee (Emma Thompson) turns up to teach these rapscallions some manners. Though this sequel lacks the dark humor with adult appeal of the first film, it’s hardly a chore to sit through for adults, either. The bright silliness — cute swimming piglets, a burping bird — may be kindergarten comedy, but it doesn’t overwhelm the more pertinent points about learning to be generous, cooperative and kind. (MJ) Rated PGShowtimes

Piranha 3D
Hollywood fervently dreams that 3D technology will be the savior of movies, but Jackass and Piranha 3D are going to do their damnedest to kill off a “genre” already heavily wounded by fakes (basically, every non-animated 3D movie except for Avatar). Piranha 3D is Snakes on a Plane, only the snakes are piranhas and we don’t have Samuel L. Jackson complaining about these mother-effing fish in three mother-effing dimensions. (DH) Rated PG-13Showtimes

The Switch
In a rather crude twist on the romantic comedy genre, BFFs Jason Bateman and Jennifer Anniston are in love. Only one problem: She doesn’t know it. When she resorts to the turkey baster in order to induce offspring, Bateman (through a comedic series of mishaps) swaps out her preferred man-seed with his own. Seven years later, the two reunite, only now Anniston’s got a neurotic Nellie in tow — who looks suspiciously like Bateman. Probably not the best movie to see on a date … or with your BFF, for that matter. (DH) Rated PG-13Showtimes

Vampires Suck
The only thing more mysterious than M. Night Shyamalan's twist endings (y'know, as long as he keeps getting to make movies) is why people continue to go see awful parodies churned out by "TWO OF THE WRITERS FROM SCARY MOVIE." You get your scatological jokes, your masturbation jokes, and I guarantee that at some point, a vampire will say something that can be misconstrued as an invitation to fellatio. Because vampires suck, get it? Get it!? (DH) Rated PG-13Showtimes

Winter's Bone
Winner of the Sundance Grand Jury Prize and oozing with pathos, this is decidedly not your typical summer fare. Ree Dolly, who’s only 17 (and played by 20-year-old Jennifer Lawrence), is taking care of her catatonic mother and two younger siblings. When her drug-dealing, bail-jumping father gets the shack they live in seized, she hunts him down in the Ozark Mountains. Unfortunately, she’s wading into dangerous meth-lab waters filled with dangerous folks like her uncle Teardrop. (DH) Rated RShowtimes