Thursday, April 14, 2011

Jess Walter gently mocks Spokane in McSweeney's

Posted By on Thu, Apr 14, 2011 at 12:59 PM

There's no shortage of Spokane mockery on McSweeney's Internet Tendency, the online humor corner of Dave Eggers' alt-publishing empire.

It comes courtesy of Kate Kershner, former Spokie and daughter of Jim Kershner, Spokesman-Review-ite (and inept fantasy baseball manager).

Never before, though, has Spokane been mocked in the PHYSICAL PAGES of Timothy McSweeney's Quarterly Concern, the haute, often absurdist literary journal that started it all.

Never before, that is, UNTIL NOW.

In issue 37, Jess Walter offers his "Statistical Abstract for My Hometown, Spokane, Washington" which excerpts a little something like this:

3. Spokane is sometimes called the biggest city between Seattle and Minneapolis, but this is only true if you ignore everything below Wyoming, including Salt Lake City, Denver, Phoenix, and at least four cities in Texas.

4. This is really just another way of saying nobody much lives in Montana or the Dakotas.

5. My grandfather arrived in Spokane in the 1930s, on a freight train he'd jumped near Fargo. Even he didn't want to live in the Dakotas.

6. On any given day in Spokane, Washington, there are more adult men per capita riding children's BMX bikes than in any other city in the world.

It has no online presence per se, so if you want to read the rest — and you know you do — you should buy it, either from Aunties or from McSweeney's themselves.

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