Tuesday, November 15, 2011

Want to be an astronaut? Apply here

Posted on Tue, Nov 15, 2011 at 11:51 AM

Ever want to punch through the stratosphere? Homestead on Mars? Or simply just chill in a no-gravity situation?

I've got good news for you. NASA is hiring astronauts. 

That's right. The government space program held a press conference today to discuss recruiting America's finest to staff its space shuttles Russian rockets and the International Space Station.

And they know that's kind of boring. So they also dangled a humdinger: the prospect of exploring Mars.

Sign me up, I'll go to Mars. Hell, if they give me sufficient rocket fuel and Cheetos, I'll go to Pluto.

Trouble is, they don't seem to think I'd make a qualified astronaut. According to Janet Kavandi, NASA flight crew oprations director (shown above),  NASA wants all their recruits to have backgrounds in high-performance flight, engineering, mathematics and science.

Whatever, NASA. If you put all the college science classes I flunked next to the ones I passed, that pretty much gets me a undergrad degree. Possibly a master's.

And NASA wants you to have relevant job experience. I'd count my watching 2001: A Space Odyssey, reading The Right Stuff and thinking deeply about the cosmos — dude, there are so many galaxies! — as fair game. 

The space agency also wants you to be between 62 (5'7") and 75 (about 6'3") inches. That's an obstacle for me, but not insurmountable. If I can wear platform shoes into space.

Maybe you, dear reader, will make a more "natural" candidate than me. View the job posting for yourself here.

Good luck. And remember kids, you must be 62 inches tall to ride. 

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