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Re: “Hopeless for Heroin

The whole point of this article is cool and  heroin is some pretty messed up shit that causes some bad things to happen just as what happen with Rachel. The thing I can't stand about this article is that the dude who wrote it when he interviewed me there was so much stuff he left out about how, I Rachel's boyfriend tried to help the situation even though I allegedly said I sold drugs and she liked to do them, and we thought they were fun. Now to let everyone who doesn't know this but if anyone had every used drugs especially the hard drugs we used together they would know there is nothing fun about them and if you knew me and Rachel and seen us regularly then you would know our relationship was every thing but drugs that was just the only thing I didn't like was that I met the love of my life by using. There is nothing fun about it  the moment I met Rachel & found out that she was doing the drugs she used I thought to myself why is this beautiful girl doing the drugs she was using and the way she was doing them. It was upsetting even though at the time I was using the same drugs but I have a good heart and want the best for the people I care about. Now at the time of this it was when I first met her and even though I didn't know her very well I still had that want to care for her because she gave me such a good vibe when I first seen her using. Now when me and her were together the way I went about helping her was that I trying to be as real with her as much as I could and not a controlling boyfriend plus I was also using myself at the time. So I was never hiding any my using from her because I didn't want her to hide it from me, I wanted her to be open with me about any time she would use so I would know that way I could make sure she was safe. The dude who wrote the article left out a big part of what actually happened so now when ever me and her used drugs together there was not one time she ever overdose when ever we got high together and when she had passed that morning yeah I was there with her at her gmas but I was clean because I had just done a month in jail. The whole time I was locked up I talked to her on the phone almost every day. 2 to maybe 3 times a day, I got arrested with $750 by the time I got released I only had $270 in that one month we talked a bunch of calls because I probably only order store/commissary three times and only spent $50 or less, that just shows how much we loved each other we could not ever get bored or tired of hearing each others voices. I would constantly talk to her about how we should be clean together when I got out I would tell her to look at how good our relationship is while we're on drugs and we were such a good couple for the ones that actually knew our relationship and seen it for them self they would tell you that we were in loved beyond being in love and we were on the same level that I never thought I could be with a girl. I would talk with her on the phone from jail to just think about how good our relationship would be if we were clean and just from me talking to her from jail every day she was getting clean for the most part while I was locked up which she had to be pretty motivated to get clean as much as she was. So when I got out we were doing so good that this whole thing was not expected like this article makes it sounds like we seen this was going to happen but thats not even how it was. The dude also left out the part that when she overdose that morning is that everyone else was sleeping even myself which I wish I would of been getting high when I got out because I could of been with her when she decided to relapse with out having the tolerance that she had when she was really using a lot. So that night the last thing I said to her before I was woken up in the early morning was that "I love her good night baby" and she was sleeping in my arms and then I fell asleep then sometime after I fell asleep she woke up without waking up anyone else and went into the bathroom to get high by herself because she didn't want me to know nor her Nana because she knew at the time we promised each other we were going to be clean or try our very best too and if one of us were struggling with those demons that we would say something before we acted upon it, she must of thought I would of got mad at her if she was to tell me her reason for wanting to and thought it would of caused a fight. I would of been upset but not mad because I'm not like that and she just wanted to probably just do it that bad that she wasn't trying to have any distractions in the process of relapsing the last time. If she was going to use then she would of no matter what but I was always chill about it and I wouldn't freak out because people who get mad and try to force people to do things they don't want is what you call controlling which was definitely not how I was to her because I'm sure she wouldn't of love me as much if I was ever like that to her. Plus her and her father were constantly   fighting over things he was trying very hard to force her to do them and I could see she had lots of anger built up towards him because he was that way and I know she loves her dad and he loves her but my opinion to parents who want to help don't be so demanding or aggressive and try to control their every move because from what I have seen and also exspirence myself growing up is that when parents act that way it doesn't help it only makes them not want to even talk to there parents, it pushes them away, and it builds a hate for their own parents. I just want everyone to see that this way doesn't work when it comes to trying to raise kids, well In this case save your kid from drugs. I told her that I wouldn't be mad or angry if she wanted to get high but that I still wanted to know that way I could know if she was safe, which I said this to Rachel the day before her passing. So she went in there by herself and overdose while everyone was sleeping then her Nana was the first to notice and before she even open the bathroom door all the way she was screaming my name to help her that it's Rachel is what she said and I instantly jumped up out of a deep sleep and right away ran into the bathroom and did everything that someone could possibly do to try to save a person when they are overdosing and when it comes to that type of situation I have had some other exspirence's with overdose's before with old friends and even myself being the one who O.D but not ever to the point where some one was not saved and brought back to life. So from all the times I have dealt with that I have actually been pretty smart with paying very good attention on what the paramedics do and I also ask them questions on what the best thing to do up until they arrive. So from me taking in what they have shown me and told me to do I know really what I'm doing if that was to happen with anyone around me and I got that trade down to the t probably just as good as the EM crew and they had to go to school to learn and be certified.I tried so hard to save the love of my life the whole time until the paramedics got there then I let them take over but I didn't stop trying to bring her back one time until they showed up. This is by far the worst thing I have ever had to go threw and never really thought that would ever happen to me to lose her like that and even at that time when we were supposed to be clean it was unexpected to me. I just hope this doesn't happen to anyone I know or even If I don't know you even if I didn't even like you I hope no one has to ever deal with this serious of a accident. I just hope every one who reads this just gets a better understanding of what really happen and to not ever take any moment for granted when it comes to the people you care a lot about because tomorrow isn't always promised for all of us, so just make sure you always tell the ones you care about that you love them everyday because not everyone gets to have the opportunity that I had by being able to say the last thing I said to her was that "I love you goodnight baby" and I'm so grateful for that but this whole situation has really fucked me up and continues to makes me upset every day. Sorry such along comment but I just felt like I needed to correct the details this article left out on some important things they forgot to mention that I said to writter when he interviewed me. So thank you for reading this and I hope you can read it alright because I typed it all from the phone so give me some slack if I made a couple mistypes. Rip to the most beautiful person I have ever met Rachel Michelle Meyers I love you more then words could ever explain and I hope you watch over me like you have, sweet dreams baby girl.

           Ps- someone must of reported my first comment I posted on this article which was basically the same thing as the first one idk why someone would ever want to try to hide the truth behind this wonderful persons life that I happen to share some of my closes feelings with as so did she with me. We were closer with each other then we were to anyone of our friends and even our family's we were inseparable with each other up until her passing. She was the star to my heart and always will be no matter what baby girl I promise you that your always going to be my number one in my heart and since you held that spot when you were alive when you passed you took my heart with you so hold onto it until I am able to catch back up with you in the next life we live.

1 like, 0 dislikes
Posted by Thomas Jones on 08/03/2015 at 5:19 PM

Re: “Homeless Lessons

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Posted by Frank Judit on 08/03/2015 at 4:47 PM

Re: “Hopeless for Heroin

I am so sorry! Thank you for sharing your story. Sadly it is the story of many families right now. Our daughter who is 34 is also a heroin /meth addict. Has lost custody of our 7 year old grandson, which is a blessing in itself. we know he is safe and well loved and cared for. Again, family members have done everything possible to make her get help, even the thought of not having her son with her hasn't taken away her desire to get high. A stunning beauty before the drugs, graduated from the U of W business school, she too has lied, cheated, stolen to get the drugs no matter what devastation has been left behind, she continues on with no remorse. All we can do is pray for all. So sorry for your loss, your child is no longer living the life of hell on earth, Satan has provided this avenue to destroy Gods children. Praying for your healing.

3 likes, 1 dislike
Posted by sad on 08/03/2015 at 8:11 AM

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