Wednesday, June 27, 2012

It's All in a Name

Hoopfest squads call themselves the darndest things

Annie Szotkowski, Mike Bookey
Hoopfest’s tradtion of goofy team names could result in an Angry Nirds vs. Blue Prancing Ninjas matchup. [Photo: Jim Campbell Illustration]
Hoopfest’s tradtion of goofy team names could result in an Angry Nirds vs. Blue Prancing Ninjas matchup. [Photo: Jim Campbell Illustration]
Hoopfest’s tradtion of goofy team names could result in an Angry Nirds vs. Blue Prancing Ninjas matchup. [Photo: Jim Campbell Illustration]

The object of Hoopfest, of course, is to win games. Well, and to have fun, too. But there’s a secondary, less-discussed contest underway and that’s the battle to have the most creative (or funniest, grossest, most macho) team name in the field.

We’ve gone through the more than 7,000 teams entered in this year’s tournament and handpicked a few of the more amusing titles and handed out some not-soofficial awards to those who went the extra mile. If your squad is not on the list, we’re sorry. You’ll have to turn your attention to the actual basketball. 

Best Potential Matchup
This Better Be Fun vs This is Not for Fun

Best Emo Band Name
Tears of a Gypsy

Best Beverage Suggestion
Beer Flavor Gatorade

Best Display of Immaturity
Watch R Balls Bounce

Best Gangster-Derived Name
Ankle Bustas or Arthritic Mafia

Best M.F.-ing Name
Samuel L. Jackson

Best Pretend Animal
Lazer Wolves

Best Honesty
I Need a Breather
Runner Up:
I’m Fat and Slow

Best Use of One Word
AnthonyDavisUnibrow

Best Dressed
Bad in Plaid

Best Low Blow
Shawn Kemp’s Kids

Best Finesse
Blue Prancing Ninjas

Best Word Play
The Angry Nirds

Best Illicit Drug Reference
Trippin’ Balls

The: “Try Again Next Year” Award Goes To...
TOOOODRUNKTOOOO- DUNK

Also in Arts & Culture Feature

Bring Out the Shears

Interplayers' Seeds of Change could use some hefty pruning

E.J. Iannelli |
Friday, May 24,2013

Artist to Artist

My 27-year creative friendship with Spokane's Daniel Boatsman

Joel Hartse |
Wednesday, May 22,2013

TV | Arrested Development

The show's comedic gems could only be appreciated after its cancellation

Kara Stermer |
Wednesday, May 22,2013

Connecting the Dots

Melissa Cole has been around the world, and so has her artwork

Carrie Scozzaro |
Wednesday, May 22,2013

Also By Annie Szotkowski, Mike Bookey

Crosstown Spirit

At North Central and Shadle Park, the effort to keep high school spirit games at the Arena continues

Mike Bookey |
Thursday, January 3,2013

Post Mortem Dance Party

LCD Soundsystem quit at its pinnacle, then made a movie about it

Mike Bookey |
Tuesday, July 10,2012

TV | Closing The Office

Mike Bookey |
Wednesday, September 19,2012

The People of Sasquatch

The music festival has become one of the Northwest’s biggest events because of its people

Mike Bookey |
Wednesday, May 22,2013

MAC Shake-up

The Northwest Museum of Arts and Culture suddenly fires its executive director.

Mike Bookey |
Wednesday, May 2,2012


 
 
Close
Close
Close