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by Inlander Staff & r & & r & Pluto R.I.P. & r & We've lost a planet, folks. No worries -- there's a new mnemonic for remembering the eight remaining spheroids: My very educated morons just screwed up numerous planetariums.

Master Tuner Apprentices & r & At upcoming concerts, the Spokane Symphony will be trying out candidates for concertmaster: William Harvey of the Juilliard School at the parks concerts this weekend and at the Brahms Requiem on Oct. 20; Daisuke Yamamoto of the Cleveland Institute of Music in concerts on Sept. 9 and Sept. 15; and Mateusz Wolski of the Annapolis Symphony on Sept. 30 and for the Brahms Blast on Oct. 6. When they walk onstage, be sure to give them a nice golf-clap.

Metaphors Be With You & r & A gaggle of poets will soon be pulling into town as part of the Poetry Bus Tour 2006. The peripatetic versifiers plan to hit 50 cities in 50 days, no doubt strewing crumpled paper wads with discarded similes all along the way.

Litterbugs. Anyway, on Tuesday, Sept. 5, from 5-7 pm, at the Peaceful Valley Community Center, poets Held, Lamon, Nichols and Zapruder et al. will hold forth and then engage in a mean game of softball. From 7:30-8:30 pm at Auntie's Bookstore, rhymesters Beckman, Lederer, Marshall, McCann, Noel, Wing and others will expose their onomatopoeia. Visit

Dishing Off for an Assist & r & Gonzaga has instituted an annual benefit game called the Ronald McDonald House Charities Classic; in the first installment, the Zags will take on Memphis on Feb. 17. Catch the game and help the families of hospitalized children. Visit

Don't Bonk & r & The world championships for Masters-level (i.e., age 30 and older) mountain bikers will take place on Sept. 1-3 in Sun Peaks, British Columbia (45 minutes north of Kamloops). One of the nation's best single-track downhill racers is Doug Minor, 51, of Nine Mile Falls. Good luck, Doug!.

Wickedness in High Places & r & That's what kids have to resist these days, according to Ephesians 6:12, and what better way to help them than by purchasing some Armor of God pajamas? Just $40 a pair (includes breastplate of righteousness). Just visit -- you can bet those money-changers in the Temple wish they had.

Free Mobius! & r & To celebrate its first birthday, admission to the children's Museum in River Park Square will be free on Saturday, Sept. 2 from 10 am-5 pm. Check out the Enchanted Forest and Geotopia.

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