Pin It
Favorite

JOE WILSON, SERENA AND KANYE KICK OFF OUTBURST WEEK 

JOE WILSON, SERENA AND KANYE KICK OFF OUTBURST WEEK

Rep Joe Wilson (R-SC), tennis legend Serena Williams and recording artist Kanye West held a press conference in Washington, D.C. earlier this week to kick off the first annual National Outburst Week.

“We’re here to celebrate every American’s right to unleash a sudden, unprovoked verbal outburst,” Ms. Williams said. “And if you don’t like it, you can shove this tennis ball down your f---ing…” “Hold up, Serena,” said Mr. West, seizing the microphone. “I just want to say that Beyonce’s video is one of the greatest videos of all…” “You lie!” shouted Rep. Wilson. In a related story, saying that “uncontrolled verbal outbursts are becoming a scourge on our society,” President Barack Obama named Vice President Joe Biden to chair a newly formed commission on outbursts.

While Mr. Obama’s decision to create the commission was seen as a thinly veiled spanking of Rep. Joe Wilson (R-S.C.), who last week shouted, “You lie!” at Mr. Obama in the House of Representatives, it may also have been intended to deflect criticism from Mr. Obama himself, who this week called recording artist Kanye West a “jackass.”

Mr. Obama said that verbal outbursts were a growing problem and could cost billions of dollars annually in beer summits alone.

“Regardless of how you feel about a national commission on outbursts, I think we can all agree that Joe Biden is the perfect person to head it up,” Mr. Obama said.

For more fake news from awardwinning humorist Andy Borowitz, check out borowitzreport.com.

  • Pin It

Latest in Comment

  • A Win for Everyone
  • A Win for Everyone

    The water protectors at Standing Rock achieve an important victory
    • Dec 8, 2016
  • My Dinner with Fidel
  • My Dinner with Fidel

    Looking back nearly 20 years, when three Americans sat down with the Western Hemisphere's most notorious communist
    • Dec 8, 2016
  • 'No' to Sessions
  • 'No' to Sessions

    Trail Mix: Murray opposes AG pick Sessions, McMorris Rodgers' future
    • Dec 8, 2016
  • More »

Comments

Subscribe to this thread:

Add a comment

Today | Mon | Tue | Wed | Thu | Fri | Sat
Gingerbread Build-Off

Gingerbread Build-Off @ Davenport Grand Hotel

Sun., Dec. 11, 10 a.m.-4 p.m.

All of today's events | Staff Picks

Most Commented On

  • Unfinished Business

    Isaiah Wall wants to get his life on track. But first, he's gotta buy drugs for the police
    • Nov 17, 2016
  • Fake-News Nightmare

    The social media dream of the 2000s is fading, but we can reset the system by sticking up for the truth
    • Dec 1, 2016
  • More »

Top Tags in
News & Comment

Briefs


green zone


marijuana


TRAIL MIX


Comment


Readers also liked…

  • To Kill the Black Snake
  • To Kill the Black Snake

    Historic all-tribes protest at Standing Rock is meant to stop the destruction of the earth for all
    • Sep 8, 2016
  • A Culture of Support
  • A Culture of Support

    The season is ripe for compassionate change
    • May 13, 2015

© 2016 Inlander
Website powered by Foundation