I Saw You

Week of May 5


You Are Magnetic to Me: The very first time I saw you, I handed you a cup. An exchange so menial and mundane. For me, something in that moment was undeniably exhilarating. Perhaps it IS an intuitive connection. I'm not sure, as I have never before experienced such a positively unshakable feeling. Your captivating mystery has me so incredibly curious. I hope an excellent friendship is on the near horizon, I believe something is there to be explored. I look forward to our next encounter, you beautiful, beautiful human.

Scoot Goofin': I saw you, zipping around, saving a shit ton on gas, having more fun than anyone ought to while running errands or commuting or wherever you were headed. I know you, but we haven't met yet. It's probably time for you to join a gang. Specifically a scooter gang. More specifically the Spokane Mild Riders. You can find us on the Grams (IG). We ride Monday nights. Can't wait to meet you!


Toleration: Thank you so much to the wonderful few in Spokane who still tolerate my presence so long after I darkened their respective doors. You may have long forgotten why I was even there in the first place, but you've made a happy man very old, or vice versa. Thank you from the heart of my bottom.

Browne's Addition: To the family that has a home by Sunset Grocery. I saw a news report of someone disrespecting their home by trying to light a sign on fire. I so want to let them know that I appreciate that the family mentioned the arson fire in Browne's Addition that left two persons dead. I apologize. You're doing a great job.

Bloomsday Freebie Fun: Huge "Cheers!" to the Bloomsday spectators giving out donuts at the top of Doomsday. It's the only reason I run up Doomsday Hill. Good to be back, and thank you to those make Bloomsday so much fun!


Pay Attention and VOTE: When are people going to start paying attention to what is happening in their cities? Every single election season the same people are elected to office (give or take a few good ones) that continually go against our best interests. Stop blaming the media and "fake news." Do your research. These elections are IMPORTANT. If you can't take the time to check a few boxes, then you have absolutely NO right to complain if they do something you disagree with. Your vote is your voice. If you don't feel like you are being heard, get out into the community and talk to your neighbors. Knock on doors. Donate to campaigns. Write letters. If you allow elected officials to take away your freedom of speech, spend money frivolously, and use their position to intimidate and influence others negatively, then you deserve the policy and bad choices that come with that.

Offices Ahead of Homeless? The House of Charity closing, why? Because homeless are an embarrassment for our city leaders. I've volunteered at the House of Charity and seen the impact they are to our homeless. So close the shelter and move them out of the city, and put offices in its place. That's what Spokane needs, more offices. Wrong! The homeless need that shelter and more of them; they need mental health services, which they don't have access to. This is not always their life choice, to live on the streets, but if you can work and you don't have an address, you don't get a paycheck. I'm ashamed of our city leaders pretending to care about our homeless, and professing that, once the new shelter is built, the homeless will have access to mental help — where was it before? I just know when I drive by the shelter after it's closed, I will feel ashamed. Offices ahead of homeless.

Bad Joke: To the girl I bought comedy tickets from for the Saturday show. I found your post on Facebook. Thought it might be a great night to go out. So I text you, we agreed on a price face value. I sent you the money. Then you replied, "Oh there is a name transfer fee per ticket." At this point I felt sucked in and that I'd already spent some money, so a little more to go to a show would be OK. Then within 5 minutes after I sent it, there was no reply. Then the reply was "Wait please." Now I have no tickets and less money. May the world show you as much kindness as you showed me.

Know Your Concert Etiquette: This is to the group behind us on the upper floor, level 221 at the Paul McCartney concert (specifically the guy directly behind me). I understand that you haven't been to a concert for the past 2½ years. I get it. Yet that doesn't give you a license to be extremely inconsiderate to the concertgoers around you. Your screaming and hollering was deafening, your singing at the top of your lungs was horrifying, and talking loud between songs while Paul was telling stories was just the icing of the cake. There is such a thing called concert etiquette. My friend and I wanted to turn around and tell you guys to shut the f—- up. We didn't pay to hear you sing. I am all for enjoying the concert and having fun, but when your actions make the experience miserable to the ones around you, it's not cool. I hope at your next concert, you are around someone who behaves the same way you guys did.

DHS Department of Disinformation: The new Truth Czar Nina Jankowicz under the Department of Homeland Security is going to step in and help the Inlander keep you from learning anything that seems counter to what you should know. That should give you chills, but I'm guessing at this point probably not. So, First Amendment will go out with a whimper. Which means (even IF the Inlander prints this, which I doubt) you won't be reading seditious pieces like this worrying about freedom of speech. Of course, there will be pieces submitted as long as they follow the party line. Can you think of any countries that already do that? There is one Right Now invading the Ukraine that practices those same rules.

Housing Problem or a Work Problem? Jobs going unfilled. Not paying enough? How qualified are you? All kinds of jobs are out there. Easy, I guess, to pick on a blight that is the tent town out off Thor on Second. No, I haven't stopped and canvassed whether people there are looking for work or just interested in a handout. Lots of people are angry about how there is a shortage of affordable housing. Help those in the short run to get on their feet. Tell those that just want to milk the system it's time to get off your you know what and go to work like the rest of us!

Cheers and Jeers Bloomsday: Cheers and Jeers for 2022 Bloomsday. Cheers to all of the wondeful volunteers and organization who put on the in-person "race" once again after a two-year break due to the response to the coronavirus. Cheers also to the weather, the cheerers along the route and the musicians. It was nice to be back again. Jeers to those who participated who once again were unable to follow directions. The rules and policies of the event clearly indicate that ear buds aren't to be worn because of inability to hear others. Nevertheless, many wore ear buds while aimlessly bumping into other participants. Some were so stupid they constantly were on their phones looking down at it adjusting their music while doing the same. Also, why is it so difficult to understand that walkers stay to the right on the course while runners stay to the left? Many of you started ahead of where you should have. If you wish to walk, start in back. In the future, it might be good to post more of those signs along the route reminding the foolish of the rules. Perhaps a picture can be shown to illustrate which direction is left and which direction is right as well as what it means to walk versus run. ♦

Broken Mic @ Neato Burrito

Wednesdays, 6:30 p.m.
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