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& lt;font color="#FFFFFF" & & lt;h1 & Balancing Act & lt;/h1 & & lt;h5 & Books | Booze | Work | Drugs | Activism & lt;/h5 & & lt;/font &

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& lt;font size="2" & & & Inside & & & r & & lt;ul &

& lt;li & & lt;a href="#friends" & Friends & lt;/a & & lt;/li &

& lt;li & & lt;a href="#budget" & Budget & lt;/a & & lt;/li &

& lt;li & & lt;a href="#drugs" & Drugs & lt;/a & & lt;/li &

& lt;li & & lt;a href="#causes" & Causes & lt;/a & & lt;/li &

& lt;li & & lt;a href="#classes" & Classes & lt;/a & & lt;/li &

& lt;li & & lt;a href="#work" & Work & lt;/a & & lt;/li &

& lt;li & & lt;a href="#life" & Life After College & lt;/a & & lt;/li & & lt;/ul & & lt;/font &

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& lt;font size="2" & & & The Schools & & & r & & lt;ul &

& lt;li & & lt;a href="#wsu" & Washington State & lt;/a & & lt;/li &

& lt;li & & lt;a href="#scc" & Spokane C.C. & lt;/a & & lt;/li &

& lt;li & & lt;a href="#sfcc" & Spokane Falls C.C. & lt;/a & & lt;/li &

& lt;li & & lt;a href="#zag" & Gonzaga University & lt;/a & & lt;/li &

& lt;li & & lt;a href="#ewu" & Eastern Washington & lt;/a & & lt;/li &

& lt;li & & lt;a href="#whi" & Whitworth University & lt;/a & & lt;/li &

& lt;li & & lt;a href="#uoi" & University of Idaho & lt;/a & & lt;/li &

& lt;li & & lt;a href="#nic" & North Idaho College & lt;/a & & lt;/li &

& lt;li & & lt;a href="#wsus" & WSU Spokane & lt;/a & & lt;/li & & lt;/ul & & lt;/font &

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& lt;/center & & r &

& lt;a name="friends" & DEVELOPING YOUR ENTOURAGE & lt;/a &

& lt;span class= "dropcap " & F & lt;/span & our months ago, you had it all. As a senior in high school with plenty of friends, you were at the top of the food chain. You threw your graduation cap in the air with everybody else, excited to begin the next stage of your life. But now, here you are again, a freshman at the bottom rung of the ladder. Strange town. No social net. You need to start making new friends, fast.

Don't be stupid, though. College is hard. You need a crew that you can exploit employ to get you through it. Here's our guide to the basics. Use it.

The Local One of the more essential members of the entourage, the local student not only knows the ins and outs of the city, but also has a mom nearby. You'll get the occasional home-cooked meal and hopefully somebody to do your laundry.

Extra Credit: When local kid's parents go out of town, you can party in a place that doesn't smell like vomit and beer.

Daddy's Girl (or Boy) Look for somebody who wears the same size as you and has an extensive wardrobe. If you're lucky, he or she also has Daddy's no-limit platinum Visa and loves to spend his money.

Conversation starter: The first time you hang out, offer him or her one of your shirts to wear. He or she will feel obligated to reciprocate.

Potentially Famous Kid Find a young star in the theater department. You'll have to sit through some awful renditions of Waiting for Godot, but when he nails a starring role in the new Michael Bay movie, you've hit the jackpot. Hopefully you won't even have to finish college.

Extra Credit: Find somebody who's not only potentially famous later, but also good-looking now.

Don't be so foolish... as to try and befriend the NBA-bound basketball players. They have a million people on their nuts already.

Smart, Amoral Kid College is hard. It's harder if you don't cheat. Find a student who has a major that complements yours and also loves to prove how smart he/she is. If you're a mechanical engineer who's borderline illiterate, find an English major. If you're in communications, handle your core requirements by befriending a math guy.

Conversation starter: (Math major) "Bet you don't know what a puissant variable is"; (Eng major) "Bet you don't know what a Bildungsroman is."

Nursing Major (for guys and lesbians) The ratio of females to males in nursing programs at most colleges is something like 1,000 to 1. Find either the one, or one of the 1,000, then hang on.

Don't be so foolish... as to become a nursing major yourself. Down that path lies "just friend" territory.

Sports Therapy Major (for girls and gay guys) After giving deep-tissue massages to all the basketball and football players, your friend will have cell numbers for most of them.

Don't be so foolish... as to make friends with an engineer. Rookie mistake. While most engineering programs are 90 percent guys, those guys are about 80 percent dork.

The Mediaphile Every dorm has the guy who comes to college with an Xbox 360, a Nintendo Wii and 200-plus DVDs. Why waste your money when you can sit on his couch, playing Halo 3 on his plasma screen? Pick wisely, though, or it'll be Tom Cruise's greatest hits and Smash Brothers tournaments till you bleed out your ears.

Conversation starter: "Know who sucks? Tom Cruise."

The Foreigner You never know when you'll want to visit Paris (or Phnom Penh or Helsinki).

The Beard Guy Sometimes college students pass the time by participating in activities they are not permitted to perform (technically) by law until age 21. Having a friend who appears to be 21 -- when he is, let's say, only 18 -- will help make said activities possible.

The Roommate Default member of any entourage. You'll either get a BFFL or get the creep who sleeps with a humidifier. You may need to manipulate a transfer.

Subtle manipulation with Mad Libs: "I don't even think there is a ____[desired major]____ program here, although there is a really good one at ____[a university in another country]____. You know, in ____[that country]____. I just think you should do what you love in college, that's all."


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& lt;a name="#budget" & SAVING MONEY & lt;/a &

& lt;span class= "dropcap " & I & lt;/span & arrived at Whitworth University with roughly $1,400 in my checking account -- $350 of which promptly disappeared during the first week of what I now refer to as the "I'm-away-from-home-and-insecure" shopping spree at Abercrombie & amp; Fitch.

So unless you have Daddy's credit card "for emergencies ... and shoes," browse these penny-pinching tips.

Back-to-school shopping

BTSS on your own dime? Boo. What was once a highly anticipated event consisting of running down the aisles of Target, flinging packets of brand-new erasers, Lisa Frank trapper keepers, purple Jansport backpacks and Ninja Turtle lunch boxes into the shopping cart has become nothing more than a spendy errand tainted with subconscious nags of frugality.

Buying textbooks = pain in the ass. Don't be duped into dropping $150 on SRA McGraw Hill's Biology beast just because it's easier to order it directly from the bookstore. Avoid this unfortunate freshman mistake and visit online used-book retailers like Abe's, Powell's, Amazon, Barnes & amp; Noble (used) and (But don't wait until three days before school or you'll have to pay for express shipping.) It doesn't matter if Plato's Dialogues arrives warped with Bud Light or any other material of unidentifiable nature. The "new book smell" is something you'll have to forfeit here, as your only concern (now) is legibility.

Tip: Once you're a sophomore and are able to make connections with the older students, see if you can get the book-hook-up from someone who has already taken the class.

Writing utensils are also something you'll want to have handy -- say, if you want to draw a mustache on your sleeping roommate to get him back for eating the box of cookies your mom sent you. Not that pens are expensive, but if you don't feel like dropping $5 on a pack of Bics, borrow a pen every time you visit your bank. Banks have lots of money to buy more. (Do not, however, steal pens from waitresses who are working their way through college. Only douche bags do this.)

Tip: Binders become completely obsolete in college. The only things you'll ever really need are (maybe) your textbook and a blank piece of paper. You'll eventually discover that handout protocol entails folding up papers and stuffing them in your textbook.

Liquids that give life

Alcohol makes it easier to hit on the opposite sex, and coffee keeps you awake in class. These two libations will become your primary dietary constituents. If you're a girl and 21 or older, free beer at a party probably won't be an issue. (If you're a girl and younger than 21, free beer at a party probably won't be an issue.) Freshman boys, however, kind of get the shaft on this one. (But see Robby Douthitt's advice about the Beard Guy, page 3.) Once you do turn 21, pre-funking is a smart move if you plan on waking up with more than $2 in your wallet the following morning. So unless you're the driver, showing up stone-sober at the bar is a stupid move. Generic alcohol and a bulk mixer is the way to go, like Monarch Vodka and Western Family orange juice. This will limit the number of $3 Bud Lights you need to purchase at Fast Eddies from about eight to two.

After a night of Monarch Vodka and orange juice, the next element to survival is coffee. (If you were a tea drinker in high school, now is the time to convert.) Water's important as well, but you can get water completely free from hoses and fountains and showers and rain. At $5 for a Grande Sugar-ma-chino, Starbucks is an expensive habit. Your best bet is to buy a coffee maker. Come the group study sesh at 3 am for that British Literature midterm, you'll have at least six new BFFs. Even better is scoring a job at the college coffee shop, which means free drinks for you and your posse.

detergent, bleach and fabric softener

A friend of a friend of a friend once mentioned that she used to borrow just enough to do a load of laundry, starting with the first available jug of detergent and then working her way down to the last. This act falls under the category of general thievery, but if you're really desperate and your college has a communal laundry area, it will probably go unnoticed.

This method should not be applied to hair products, as they are more expensive. If you try this method with shampoo, The Inlander will not be held responsible if you get the crap kicked out of you. See below for some alternatives to brand names.

our student ID: License to be cheap

Your university ID card is the tangible symbol of your student loan debt -- so don't be ashamed to whip that thing out and play the "I'm a starving student" sympathy card. It's pretty much the equivalent of holding up a puppy and saying, "See? We are cold and poor and hungry. Please help us." Check for student discounts with movie theaters, restaurants, social events, auto insurance, oil changes and pretty much anything that costs you money.

Tip: Never toss your student ID. As long as you don't get rhinoplasty, your ID will come in handy long after you graduate. Most of the time, people only look at the picture -- not the actual date of enrollment. Besides, it's not like your student loans magically evaporate when they hand you a diploma.


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& lt;a name="drugs" & THE MORE YOU KNOW & lt;/a &

& lt;span class= "dropcap " & D & lt;/span & rugs are illegal. So is underage drinking. But let's be honest. Even students as straight-edged as a T-square may have the urge to try a substance (or two) purely for experimental purposes. If nothing else, they'll want to be able to shrug their shoulders and say, "Yeah, I tried it." Take the classic example of Molly Ringwald in The Breakfast Club. It can happen to anybody.

No matter what you choose or choose not to smoke, drink or consume during your big years of freedom, it's in your best interest to be savvy about consequences and effects. That way, if you decide to try something, you won't be stupid about it.

Officer N of the Seattle Police Department -- recent graduate of an institution of higher learning in Washington state -- admits that he used to smoke recreationally in college. He advocates drug education. "It's the same way we educate people about pregnancies and STDs," he says, "even though we're fighting a drug war, it's best to educate instead of shutting it out."

Officer N says that when he did smoke in college, he laid down some personal rules for himself. "I'd get stoned with my friends at a party, before watching a movie or before having an in-depth conversation with someone," he says. "I never got stoned before going to classes or doing my homework, and I would only let myself do it on the weekends."

In other words, it's smart to set some boundaries for yourself. "Do only the bare minimum, and do it around people that you're comfortable with -- because if something goes bad, they are the ones who are going to take care of you," says our anonymous policeman. Just remember that moderation is key.

Marijuana (aka Mary Jane, MJ, Bud, Fat Spliff, Gange)

OK: Gearing up the "Wizard People, Dear Readers" alternative soundtrack voiceover to the Harry Potter and the Sorcerer's Stone movie.

Not OK: Operating machinery, getting stoned before a midterm, growing pot in your dorm room, trying to fly.

What can you gain: Funny memories, a good night's sleep, and the munchies.

What you can lose: Concentration, good grades, friends and money. claims smoking five joints a week is the equivalent of smoking an entire pack of cigarettes every day.

Acid (aka LSD, Crystal Tea, God's Flesh)

OK: Talking to animals or conversing with items of inanimate nature (i.e., a surfboard, wall or sneaker).

Not OK: Venturing out into public places. You'll wake up in an abandoned parking lot or jail.

What can you gain: A psychedelic trip inducing a warped perspective on life, your hands and any other objects you may encounter.

What can you lose: Your brain cells. Acid causes increased heart rate and blood pressure, lung failure, comas, nausea, hypothermia, cognitive shifts and lots of other fun stuff.

Cocaine (aka Yay, Snow, Flake, Blow, Booger Sugar)

OK: Talking really fast to random strangers about things that seem important at the moment; going for a jog.

Not OK: Doing lines off a toilet seat in the bathroom while you're at work. Ew, man.

What you can gain: An extreme high for about an hour followed by an extreme low, along with a bitter-tasting saliva coming through the roof of your mouth for the next few days.

What you can lose: Your life and most of your paycheck.

Ecstasy (aka Disco Biscuit, E, Dolphins)

OK: Laying down in a field with your friends and looking at the stars; putting on music and dancing around the living room in the dark.

Not OK: Taking it in a club, rave or accepting it from some rando you don't know.

What you can gain: A ride on the serotonin bus.

What you can lose: Ecstasy causing a loss of spinal fluid is a myth, but it can hinder your sex drive and damage the cells that produce serotonin. That's why Austin Powers doesn't take it.

OxyContin (aka Hillbilly Heroin, Killer, O.C., Oxy)

OK: Taking this drug if you have cancer, chronic back pain, or got hit by a tractor and broke your leg in five places.

Not OK: Snorting, crushing, injecting or diluting Oxy with water. This disarms the timed-release action of the medication.

What you can gain: Brief feelings of euphoria. Also HIV.

What you can lose: Your friends. Oxy users generally turn into misanthropic douchebags.

Just say no: Heroin, meth


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& lt;a name="causes" & REBELS WITH CAUSES & lt;/a &

& lt;span class= "dropcap " & P & lt;/span & oor college administrators. All they want is to keep everyone happy. They want things to go smoothly, without bumps or blips or bothers. They want the college campus to be a place of peace, a place of comfort, a place of zen.

And they would have gotten away with it, too, if it hadn't been for those meddling kids.

All it takes is a trumpet blast from a few punk students to send the walls of campus tranquility tumbling down.

This is the story of those punks. This is the tale of the troublemakers, the status-quo shakers, the simmering stew of mad-as-hell militants, activists and dissidents, the potty-mouthed offenders and the purse-lipped offended, the gadflies, pariahs and anathemas, the cause-of-the-week crusaders, the cynical idealists and the caustic romantics. These people don't just upset the apple cart. They make applesauce.

It isn't hard. Colleges are usually but a Deplorable Word away from crumbling into complete chaos.

Take the spring of 2007 at Whitworth. A student newspaper article detailing racism at Whitworth sparked a powder keg of racial tension and -- bam! -- the campus was ablaze with controversy.

Other issues flitted against this chaotic backdrop: Whitworth requested exemption from state's nondiscrimination laws, administration continued to prevent an official gay-straight alliance club from chartering, and environmentally sensitive students agitated for the school to take on a greener tinge.

All this set the stage for student Thomas Ruble -- enigmatic bohemian, vanguard of Whitworth counterculture -- to launch the 8th of May protest.

"The 8th of May is about students being students. It's about a free commerce of ideas, opinions, demands, and most importantly FRICTION," Ruble wrote in a blog comment at the time. "Flaring and glaring controversy, respectful and novel dialogue ... these are what makes a university a university."

On May 8, 2007, dozens of students stepped up to a mid-campus microphone and let rip their grievances. They riffed on racism, homophobia, environmentalism, politics and course curriculums.

At first, it seemed the 8th of May protest had resulted in absolutely zilch. Protesters and administration seemed locked in stalemate. But then, the next year, change began to happen. Environmental sustainability topped Whitworth's agenda. Open Conversation: Orientation, a gay-rights club, was allowed to form, although only without ties to any national organization. The racial tension had, if not disappeared, quieted. The protest may not have caused these changes, but still, a possibility lingered: Maybe students can make a difference.

& lt;span class= "dropcap " & E & lt;/span & astern Washington University's zeitgeist is of a much more liberal shade than Whitworth's. Good for liberals. Not as good for the College Republicans. In 2005, the group held a bake sale with lower prices for minority students. Offensive? Racist? Absolutely. That was the entire point -- to highlight affirmative action's inherent injustice and condescension.

The bake sale met a counter-protest of around 50 to 70 people, with a least one sign comparing the College Republicans to the KKK.

"People have stereotypes about conservatives -- greedy or bigoted -- that I don't think are really accurate," says Steven Wyble, current vice president of Eastern's College Republicans. Wyble says the club no longer uses shock tactics, preferring to use debates or their independent newspaper, The Eastern Republic, instead.

At Gonzaga University, meanwhile, both the conservatives and the liberals can plausibly claim to be the beleaguered underdogs -- the Rebel Alliance, the David against a full army of Goliaths.

Sure, liberal groups were infuriated when the administrators blocked performances of The Vagina Monologues, blocked a pro-abortion rights lecturer, and told the gay-rights club they couldn't use their name to advocate for gay marriage at Olympia.

But conservative groups were also pretty ticked when a Christian pro-life club couldn't charter, due to the club only allowing Christians on leadership.

And they were peeved when, five years ago or so, the College Republicans at Gonzaga got busted for "discriminatory" speech for a flyer emblazoned with the words, "Why the Left Hates America." (Hate, after all, is a hateful word.)

It took a letter from free-speech group Freedom for Individual Rights in Education (FIRE) to persuade Gonzaga to lift the punishment.

After Ryan Olson, former president of Helping Others Regarding Orientation (HERO), stuck the subtitle "A Gay Straight Alliance" onto HERO's name -- a possible, technical charter violation -- some conservatives, Olson says, tried to use it to get the club shut down.

"As a group, you're feeling like your club is constantly threatened," Olson says. "These people have constantly been holding our club under a microscope for years."

But Olson stressed that, instead of squabbling, he wants the opposing sides to work together. "The last thing I want is to be segregated," Olson says. "Students have to understand that as much as they're oppressed, change is a process and it's getting better and better."

& lt;span class= "dropcap " & A & lt;/span & t Gonzaga and Whitworth, campus politics often revolve around gays and God. At the University of Idaho, add guns to the list.

UI Student Aled Baker had always believed he had a right to carry his gun on campus. The massacre at Virginia Tech finally triggered him to do something about it. Baker formed a chapter of Students for Concealed Carry on Campus to change the University's no-gun policy. A Facebook group he started swelled to more than 200 members.

Other students strongly opposed guns on campus, perhaps concerned that Idaho's penchant for guns combined with UI's penchant for alcohol would make for a deadly cocktail.

Baker says much of that opposition is based on ignorance. "Students think they'll register for classes and be handed a 45-caliber pistol with their books," Baker says.

Instead, Baker says, getting a permit takes time and training -- training made useless at UI. "Because of na & iuml;ve and unenforceable policies, people who've gone through training are basically left defenseless," Baker says.

To highlight that helplessness, Baker's compatriots launched an "empty holster" protest. When questions about the weaponless holsters inevitably arose, the protesters could debunk misconceptions and persuade UI to turn from its gun-banning ways.

The result? Still no guns on campus.

Baker refused to simply bite the bullet and call it quits. He turned to a higher power: the state Legislature. Baker believed the university, according to the state constitution, can't regulate guns. For state entities, gun regulation belongs exclusively to the Legislature, Baker says. An amendment allowing concealed carry on campus was introduced, he says, but was traded away as part of political compromise.

But still. Maybe change isn't always the point for college rebels. Maybe the heat of the debate, that exposure to infuriating and downright ridiculous worldviews, is itself worth fighting for.

College, to put it bluntly, will open a big old can of pluralism on your ass.


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& lt;a name="classes" & ONLINE != EASY & lt;/a &

& lt;span class= "dropcap " & O & lt;/span & nline classes are nothing new for those of us in the Media Age. (It's really only a matter of time before you can finish up your biochem major on Facebook.) With gas prices the way they are, and more and more of us working through school trying to afford five-digit price tags just for tuition, going online is becoming more and more tempting. Here's what you need to know.

Online education is booming at colleges all over the country. Many are training professors just to handle the online workload. According to a study published by the Sloan Consortium, the number of students taking courses online more than doubled between 2002 and 2006. In fact, students taking courses online accounted for nearly 20 percent of the total number of full-time college students in the country by Fall 2006.

So now the obvious question: Why? Some of it is gas prices; some is just due to our generation's love of technology. But we're also getting busier. With tuition prices going up every semester, nearly half of all four-year college students -- and nearly two-thirds of students at two-year colleges -- are working on the side. You're also going to find that a lot of internship coordinators assume that you can give them a 40-hour week and also somehow make it to class. Taking courses online can alleviate all kinds of scheduling conflicts.

Granted, taking classes online seems a little sketchy, like getting a degree from the South Podunk Institute of Technology. And, truth be told, it's going to be a while before many major employers will be hiring from the all-online graduate pool. But if you're using online classes to supplement a "traditional" education (desks, books, profs, chalkboards, etc.), you should be OK. Actually, online classes from your own college and even the University of Phoenix are all accredited regionally -- meaning they're just as good as the classes you have to sit through.

Connie Broughton, managing director of Washington Online -- which provides support for online classes at community colleges in the state -- says that online classes are "absolutely" equivalent to classes given in a traditional setting. "What faculty tell us is that students who work online work the same or, in some cases, harder than other students," Broughton says. "There's no difference in terms of content." And, she adds, the best part is that "transcripts won't say it was an online course. It will just say that you took English 101 with a 3.6."

Ask around. Turns out everyone's going digital. Maybe 15 of my friends are graduates of online classes -- and though a few weren't disciplined enough, and at least one had to drop out (not due to a Warcraft addiction), most of them were proud of the experience. They finished required classes on their own schedule, and they were able to hold jobs on the side. Most said the classes were a little easier than live classes because they had time to think through ideas, rather than just blurting them out in a crowded, judging room.

You should realize, however, that online courses require a lot of work. A friend of mine at Gonzaga had to log on and post something every day for the entire six-week course, in addition to weekly assignments. But she agreed with other online students that the ability to create their own schedules and work from home was well worth the effort.

Word to the wise: If you don't have a fast or reliable Internet connection, don't even think about signing up. There's nothing like writing a few pages on a forum, hitting "post" while you're without a connection, and promptly losing two hours' worth of work. And if you're thinking that what passes for "discussion" on MySpace -- "Wel i tOHtalE & lt;3 Socrates lolz" -- will be sufficient in the online classroom, think again. "It is a very rigorous program -- online is not easy," says Paul Green, campus director and online teacher at the University of Phoenix. Full-time online students should expect 20 to 25 hours per week of work, he estimates, which is pretty similar to the time commitment for a traditional university schedule.

Just remember, doing class work online cannot be a substitute for actually talking to people. (I'm looking at you, the kid living in a single and calling home every day. You haven't met any of your neighbors yet, have you? Leave your room!) College is one of the few times in your life where you are constantly forced to socialize with people, and while it might be a pain, you're learning all kinds of important skills for the future. Like how to bullshit on the spot, how to make a coherent argument that other people can actually understand, and how to feign a smile around that girl who stole your boyfriend. Human interaction is hugely important and there's no replicating that online. (chatting with your Second Life girlfriend doesn't count.)

For avoiding an expensive commute, however -- or for working around a busy schedule or building up that resum & eacute; -- we give online courses a big thumbs-up.


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& lt;a name="work" & WORK SMARTER, NOT HARDER & lt;/a &

& lt;span class= "dropcap " & D & lt;/span & id your parents force countless hours of labor on you as a child in order to induce some sort of work ethic? Were chores and a weekly allowance the ways that Mommy and Daddy symbolized their deep concern over teaching you the value of a buck? Well, you're in college now and the point of higher learning is to learn to "work smarter, not harder," as suggested by Scrooge McDuck in the late-'80s cartoon Duck Tales. That mallard had mounds of gold, as I recall.

Some of you may want to hold down a steady job at a glorious pizza joint or restaurant. But unless you're going for that wonderful business degree, don't put the pizza slinging above your grades. If you plan to someday either open your own restaurant or work at one, great -- work your heart out in customer service. (Believe me, you will.) For the not-so-interested-in-food-service, however, your best bet will be to pick a job that complements your degree.

Now that may sound scary, but in reality, it's really easy. Go to your school's career center where they post jobs offered by businesses in town. If you find one you like, you may just sweat out a few contacts and a line to put down on your resume.

Want to stay totally focused on your grades? Better yet, want reserve the time outside of class for socializing and maybe a few sessions of World of Warcraft? No worries -- there are alternatives to the daily grind. Anyway, after you get your degree you'll have plenty of time to waste your life away for someone's else's profits and then even get taxed on it. With a little imagination, even those with the dire need for cash can get through the next four years without a loathsome, life-sucking job. Here are a few ways to obtain cash with little or no sacrifice on your part.

ASSIST YOUR PROFESSOR No one wants to grade papers, so believe me, he or she will be appreciative. This way, the person who has the most control of your current life (GPA) will actually know your name (which may come in handy later). Also, who better to spend some of your extra time with than an expert in your field?

TUTOR So you're really good at calculus. Well, not everyone is. Loan your brain out for a few hours a week -- during the hours of your choice -- and you can make some mad cash while barely lifting a finger. This way, if you're the smart/control-freak type, you'll have plenty of opportunities to make people feel that they're beneath you.

MYSTERY-SHOP Retailers and restaurants love to hire college students to pose as customers and critique their service people. This way, you get paid to eat and shop. What could be better? Also, some online places will pay you around $30 per survey you fill out about either one of their advertisements or company products.

CLEAN When some 18-year-olds enter college, they know nothing of doing laundry, vacuuming or any other domestic skills. Some of them will never have to learn it because -- for a few bucks -- you'll do it for them. So rent yourself out. It's better than a regular job: You can pick your own hours.

RENT OUT YOUR BODY AND MIND No, this is not anything depraved or disgusting. Let your college do a few experiments on you in the science or psychology department, and you could soon have yourself an hourly wage. No long-term commitment, and you may even learn a little about yourself.

For more ways to make money, check out the book 1000 Best Smart Money Secrets for Students by Debby Fowles.


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& lt;a name="life" & OAHU OR THE RIO GRANDE? & lt;/a &

& lt;span class= "dropcap " & I & lt;/span & N APRIL, I was accepted into Teach For America, an elite education program for college graduates who don't know what to do with their lives.

In May, I graduated from Gonzaga University with honors.

If everything had gone to plan, I would be in Texas right now, in the Rio Grande Valley, teaching English to a classroom full of impoverished high schoolers.

Today, instead, I am on a small island, halfway between America and Australia, doing eight hours of back-breaking labor in relentless heat for a man named Orion.

I MET Crista Mendoza on June 13 at Institute, Teach For America's five-week boot camp in Houston. We were enduring teacher's training, working with the same group of eighth-graders.

Like most TFA-ers, neither of us were particularly good educators. We were young and new to the profession, distractible and occasionally mischievous. But she was thoughtful and Stanford-educated and pretty and athletic. We hit it off.

I was not attracted to Teach For America for the opportunity to close the educational achievement gap, to help poor children make the most of their lives. I chose TFA because it provided me with a job I could tell my parents' friends about at holiday parties. I chose TFA for the income, the prestige, the chance to position myself for law school. I chose TFA for the wrong reasons.

But I chose Crista for the right ones.

Let the record show: I consider myself a realist. I have never believed in love -- because I had never been in love -- and I certainly never believed it was possible in six weeks.

I knew that when two people embark on a new relationship, they encounter the typical trappings of romance: This person is the one for me. She's different. I think I'm in love. These statements appear in diaries, mySpace pages and on hearts carved into tree trunks. They pop into the minds of everyone. The young, middle-aged and old. These are words created by irrational thoughts.

The more time I spent with Crista, though, those thoughts -- passion, certainty -- crept deeper into my brain.

"THIS PERSON IS the one for me. She's different. I think I'm in love." I remember spazzing out in a teaching seminar during the final week of Institute, terrified I would never see Crista again because she was headed to Hawaii. I was beginning to entertain the notion that this person was the one for me, that she was different. That I was in love. I excused myself from the lecture and found myself leaning against a wall in the staff bathroom.

I closed my eyes.

I thought about her beautiful smile and the way she laughed and how she made me feel intelligent and funny.

I wasn't surprised by the tears dribbling down my cheeks, but I was furious for letting them. I always fancied myself a stoic playboy, and I was certain a girl was incapable of capturing my heart. I would do the capturing, I always thought, and my college years had been marked by emptiness and a pompous conquest for lust.

I thought about the way she talked about her family, and I thought about the notes she would occasionally slip me. I thought about how much I loved those qualities. I thought about how much I loved her. I admitted it to myself.

Then I thought about living thousands of miles away from her.

AFTER INSTITUTE ENDED on July 11, I went to the Rio Grande Valley to look for housing and start my new life as a teacher. Crista, meanwhile, departed for Hawaii -- the area TFA had assigned her to teach -- to do the exact same thing.

Three days later, I bought a plane ticket to see her. I bought the ticket without remorse and despite being dead broke.

I knew I could move to Texas, teach English and make some pretty decent cash. I could have saved money and paid off student loans. I could have gained a valuable occupational experience and I could have positioned myself for a high-profile job after my two years with Teach For America.

I also know this: It wouldn't have made me happy.

The ticket had a return date, but I knew before I left that it was a one-way trip.

CRISTA CALLED ME today around noon, lunchtime for both of us.

"You're still here -- right?" She asked with a hint of concern.

I could have taken the return trip today. The flight would have left at 1:25 pm. Instead, I planned to return to my office: Acres and acres of dirt on the property I was maintaining. In the afternoon heat, insects would bite at my exposed ankles and the sun would beat down on my shirtless back. I had another three hours here, then I'd see her again.

I'm proud of the education I received at Gonzaga, though it armed me with few employable skills. The lessons I learned were more abstract -- holistic, in a sense -- but not fodder for any resume. I learned to trust my instincts and myself. I learned that hope leads to success and that success doesn't have to be measured by income.

Following your heart is nobler than chasing paper. I learned that at Gonzaga and I'm applying it here.

I smiled. "I'll be on this island as long as you are," I said.


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& lt;a name="wsu" & WASHINGTON STATE UNIVERSITY & lt;/a &

GETTING AROUND: You're in Pullman now, and while the weather might be lovely for the moment, watch yourself-because in a month it's going to drop down to 40 and you won't hear birds chirping again until April. Don't even try to drive on the icy roads; just take the bus: It's warm, cheap and reliable. Warm steam tunnels underneath the sidewalks keep ice off campus paths and are also a great way to get around during the cold months and explore the school's underbelly. Women's Transit is a free car service for girls who would rather not walk home... alone... at night.

McLOVIN': When going to Valhalla or the Coug don't take the fake ID that your brother's cousin made that has you a foot taller and ten shades darker. Both are great bars with great food (Valhalla's DJ and video screens make it a great place for weekends), but they card, and they're pretty intense about it. Don't say I didn't warn you.

THIS MEANS WAR: For those of you looking for a cause, look no further than the Library Road Project. Turns out, after working on the project for eight years (it's scheduled to finish in 2009), WSU's Capital Planning and Development has only now decided to announce that they'll be cutting down a bunch of trees in front of Avery Hall that are more than 50 years old. Faculty and staff are already up in arms, and CPD doesn't seem interested in compromise. Pick a side, make some posters and stage a protest; you'll be ahead of the curve.

EVENTS: Avoid the Freshman 15 and join ORC for a sunset kayaking trip along the Snake River Sept. 3 and Sept. 24. ZZ Top will be dropping off at Beasley Coliseum on Oct. 23 as a part of their "In Your Face Tour." Tickets go on sale on Sept. 22, so get that beard growing and see if Dad will loan you a few bucks... and promise not to come. Don't miss Up All Night on Dec. 12 when Bullet Proof Piercings will be doing their best work, giving you a chance to piss off your parents or at least ogle at the kids brave enough to do it.

WHAT'S NEW: The beautiful new CUB now features wireless Internet access, Carlita's Mexican deli and espresso, the Bookie and Bookie Cafe, U.S. Bank and Panda Express - with other additions like a Subway planned for the near future.


Unless otherwise indicated, all locations are in Pullman and 509.



1000 NE Colorado St. * 334-7775

Cougar Cottage

900 NE Colorado St. * 332-1265

My Office Bar & amp; Grill

215 S. Grand Ave. * 334-1202

Sports Page

165 S. Grand Ave. * 334-6748


The Daily Grind

102 W. Main St. * 334-9171

Zoe Coffee House

1960 NE Terre View Dr. * 334-3988



902 NE Colorado St. * 334-2520

Pita Pit

600 NE Colorado St. * 332-7482

Pizza Perfection

231 E. Main St. * 332-2222


1115 E. Main St. * 334-1895


Dissmore's Iga

1205 N. Grand Ave. * 332-2918


1700 W. Pullman Rd., Moscow, Idaho * (208) 883-8335






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& lt;a name="scc" & SPOKANE COMMUNITY COLLEGE & lt;/a &

EXPLORE: National Public Radio's Scott Simon will kick off the famous President Speakers Series this year on Oct. 28 at 7 pm. This year's campus-wide theme is "Living Lightly, Living Well," so you may want to try and bike to school a few times this year. And check out JAX Foods located on 3019 E. Mission Ave. They have all the snacks you'll need and a few surprises.

DANGER! Another reason to bike is because parking's a major headache at this S.C.C. It's a war of vehicle maneuvering as you try and get to the next available spot before someone else. Don't go to the Registar's office if you don't have to -- go to the Web. And don't buy your books here -- aim for Amazon.

WHAT'S NEW: A new Veterans Environmental Academy will feature a dozen veterans learning in the natural resources department. A new Expanded Function Dental Auxiliary program will offer a chance for dental assistants to learn how to do fillings.

EVENTS: Darryl Spencer will perform music in the Lair Coffeehouse on Sept. 25 at 11:30 am. A club fair will be on Sept. 30 from 9:30 am-12:30 pm in the Lair. This is the only way you'll meet people here, so best bet's to join a club. Greg Baird will talk about LGBTQ issues on Oct. 14 at 11:30 am.


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& lt;a name="sfcc" & SPOKANE FALLS COMMUNITY COLLEGE & lt;/a &

DON'T WASTE GAS: Go on SFCC's Website and fill out a Rideshare form. SFCC will hook you up with other students who live near you, so you can carpool, walk or bike to campus together. Oh, and no matter what anyone says, buy a frickin' parking pass. It's only $12 per quarter, and it's a $15 fine every time you park without one. Do the math.

HOLA: Need to get that language requirement out of the way? Take Spanish with Se & ntilde;ora Bonnie Brunt. She's super-nice and will have you speaking fluently (enough) in no time.

AVOID: If you value your time and your GPA, think carefully before taking on the challenge of Jim Hallam's math class. He's the most-rated prof on, and in the worst way possible. His reviews run the gamut from "Don't ever take this professor" to "He's a big meanie!" Take one of Jim Brady's classes instead.

GOING GREEN... ER, SOON: The new Sn-w'ey'-mn (feel free to call it "that new building" or just make a bunch of noise and hope people know what you're talking about) building turns out to be the first in a multi-part series of environmentally friendly renovations on campus. Next up: The Early Childhood Learning Center (ELC) is going to be torn down and rebuilt super-green. SFCC has two design firms working on the layout with plans to build... eventually.

EVENTS: Fall's Welcome Week is five days of nonstop activities. The highlight this year? Definitely inflatable sumo wrestling. Check out this quarter's Cultural Series which will focus on, according to your student government, "how cool wheelchairs are." Concerts, outdoor movies, and lectures will run throughout the quarter.


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& lt;a name="zag" & GONZAGA UNIVERSITY & lt;/a &

PAPA'S GOT A BRAND NEW BAG: Father Spitzer's March announcement that he would leave Gonzaga in July 2009 after 11 years cast a sense of anxiety throughout campus. The man -- agree with his politics or not -- overcame shoddy enrollment figures and a dwindling budget to catapult GU's image to the national forefront. Credit the basketball team's rollicking success, sure, but Spitzer's accomplishments are self-evident. Meanwhile, some University faculty members claim they knew his departure was not a matter of if, but when. Despite the soothsaying and premonitions, the question remains: Who is gonna be this Catholic school's daddy?

GROUNDBREAKING: With plans to increase the student body population each year by a few percentage points, the University has followed suit by beginning construction on a yet-to-be-named residence hall located just south of Catherine/Monica. Mono, Freshman 15 and binge drinking not included. ... The blue-collars have nearly completed the PACCAR Building, GU's first green facility, and -- barring a bonfire of Kennedy Apartments proportions -- it will connect to the Herak engineering building via skyway. ... The reflecting pool in front of College Hall is finished. So if you would like to reflect on the stupidity of attaching "reflecting" to the word pool, or renaming Gonzaga's oldest building to "College Hall," please go right ahead. Just don't throw any money in the water pit. Lord knows that's the last thing this University needs.

PUNTIN' IS A HABIT: For soccer enthusiasts appalled by Gonzaga's treacherous pitch, lay off the Haterade. A brand-spanking-new $2.5 million soccer mecca is underway, and Phase One -- the field and bleachers -- is complete. Players used the field for training camp in early August and look forward to balling on it this season. The catch? Games will now cost dollars. No word on when Phase Two -- locker rooms and concession stands -- will be finished.

BACK ON TRACK? Spokane legend Pat Tyson, of Mead High School coaching fame, became Gonzaga's first full-time cross-country and track coach in May. The former Kentucky University head man will be charged with resurrecting GU's dismal running scene and training his David to slay the West Coast Conference's Goliath: the University of Portland, winners of every men's team title since the inception of the WCC cross-country Championships in 1979.

ON THE GRIND: Three years ago, this publication hailed the Grind, the biannual fundraising dance put on by the Knights and Setons, as a depraved "skeeze-fest." I was a Knight that year, 2005, and we absolutely spazzed out. Truthfully, though, the Grind is a skeeze-fest. Just callin' a spade a spade. But in the spirit of honesty, I must highlight an oft-overlooked fact: the Knights and Setons raise a boatload of booty for charity each year. Last year? They eclipsed the $50,000 mark. That's real talk.



Jack & amp; Dan's Tavern

1226 N. Hamilton St. * 487-6546


1329 N. Hamilton St. * 487-1530



933 E. Mission Ave. * 482-1987



901 E. Sharp Ave. * 487-9235



1305 N. Hamilton St. * 487-6735

DOLLY'S CAF & Eacute;

1825 N. Washington St. * 325-9034


2931 N. Division St. * 326-7144



829 E. Boone Ave. * 483-7460


821 N. Division St. * 327-1444


810 N. Monroe St. * 327-7040



523 W. First Ave. * 747-0556


719 N. Monroe St. * 326-7251



1325 W. First Ave. * 747-1834


1217 N. Hamilton St. * 482-7623


1718 N. Hamilton St. * 483-3366



101 W. Eighth Ave. * 474-3131


704 E. Sharp Ave. * 323-4052



102 W. Indiana Ave. * 327-7405


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& lt;a name="ewu" & EASTERN WASHINGTON UNIVERSITY & lt;/a &

(W)HOLY ADVICE : So you decided for either financial or academic reasons that you're going public with your education. Don't fret. You may not get all of the handholding of a private institution, but you have advisor Lane Hopkins. He's the top-rated faculty on, and he's not even a professor. One student wrote, "He knows his stuff. He will explain all the ins and outs of the system and help you avoid the doo doo." Before you go to class, get an appointment with him (359-2346).

AWARDS AROUND: Newsweek magazine named EWU the "Best Value for the Tuition Dollar." This college may run on the inexpensive side, but you're getting the most out of your buck. Think of EWU as the Honda of the college world. It's fuel-efficient and it will get you around town with style. Yet it's still a public institution, so be sure to either paint it pink or install a really cool GPS device to add a little spice to that degree.

GATTO GO: Lenny's Italian Restaurant is the place you take your parents so they think they made a good investment by sending you to college. Or after they've seen your MySpace page. Gatto's Pizza is the place to go without them, as it has the old Pac Man and Star Trek Voyager arcade machines.

EXPLORE: Zip's, on First Street, has free wi-fi and is open 24 hours. Cram for a test here or do what most do -- get a burger at 3 am and sober up. Watch out for the meth heads.

DANGER! Watch out for the Washington State Patrol -- they're liable to sting you for going even five miles over on Michael P. Anderson Highway or Elm Street. So when you're late to class, just accept your fate and go to Tully's Coffee instead and read the paper. You know at least one classmate who takes good notes, right? Also, prices say avoid the EWU bookstore. Go to the Tree of Knowledge instead. You can save, like, 20 bucks on your books. Lastly, beware Dryden Hall. It's always really hot, and some of the windows don't open. The fire alarm goes off all the time, which makes the above kind of scary. It's also Party Central. Weird smells come out of the vents.

WHAT'S NEW: The new Rec Center is finally here -- and worth the wait. It's got a running track, indoor climbing wall, an ice rink and waterless urinals. Don't worry -- Cheney's institute for higher learning knows as well as anyone that waterless urinals just plain don't work. That just means the urinals use less water, according to Eastern's media dude, Dave Meany. Yes, EWU's jumped on the green train. The Rec's builders incorporated save-the-Earth techniques in its landscaping and lighting design.


All locations in Cheney.


Willow Springs

809 First St. * 235-4420

The Basement

315 First St. * 869-5206

Eagles Pub

809 First St. * 235-4420



Pence Union Building, EWU campus * 359-2540

Pita Pit

122 College Ave. * 324-9663

Tawanka Commons

EWU campus * 359-2540



1204 First St. * 235-6126

Gatto's Pizza

1011 First St. * 235-2800

Corona Village

1810 Second St. * 559-5422

Chinese Gardens

1106 First St. * 235-6926

Fiesta Charra

505 Second St. * 235-5689


Eagle Espresso & amp; Freshen's Smoothie Bar

Pence Union Building, EWU campus * 359-2540

Thomas Hammer

Pence Union Building, EWU campus * 235-4014



Pence Union Building, EWU campus * 359-2540



911 First St. * 235-8405


Cheney Trading Company

4 Cheney-Spokane Rd. * 235-6310


Tree of Knowledge

409 First St. * 559-5394

EWU Bookstore

Pence Union Building, EWU campus * 359-2292


Washington State Liquor Store

2720 First St. * 235-6465


Ben Franklin

6 Cheney-Spokane Rd. * 235-6215


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& lt;a name="whi" & WHITWORTH UNIVERSITY & lt;/a &

HIDDEN AWESOME PROFESSOR: Known primarily to English majors, Vic Bobb is a professor you need to take at least one class from -- even if you're majoring in calculus. His verbal nuggets are the kind you pass down to your kids, and his engaging classes consist of no-frill, note-free lectures that tend to meander down fascinating (or just terrifically random) rabbit trails.

BEST MEAL AT SAGA: French dips every other Wednesday.

WORST MEAL AT SAGA: The international food at "Saga" ranges from mushrooms on noodles, mushrooms on rice, and mushrooms on mushrooms on mushrooms. Life's one unchanging constant is not death or taxes or even love; rather, it is Saga mushrooms.

CLASSES TO GET OUT OF THE WAY: Core 150. Core 250. Core 350. Enough said. Transfer students: Do a little dance. You only have to take one of these! We recommend 250. Choose wisely.

EGADS! Take care to mind the Whitworth "Big 3." If you're a closet alcoholic who likes to spend the entire night in the same sleeping quarters as the opposite sex and hit people with golf clubs when you get in trouble for it, then WSU may be a better option. FYI, if someone sees you in a Facebook picture in a dorm room with an empty beer bottle on the windowsill and tattles, that's more than enough for the dean to convict you. No joke.

TRADITION: Whitworth students aren't slaves to tradition as much as champions of it. Tip to frosh: Nothing gives away your newbie status faster than referring to food service Sodexho as "Sodexho." No, it's Saga, despite the fact that that particular food service went out of business more than 22 years ago. (No regular undergrad was alive when Saga was still in business.) Whitworth upper-management tried to squash the "Ring-by-Spring-as-requirement-for-graduation" meme. Not going to happen. For 10 years, administrators condemned freshmen initiation rituals involving garbage, grease and freshmen -- but many students just continued to perform the sacred rites off-campus.

RIVALRIES: Even speaking of the infamous rivalry between freshman dorm Baldwin-Jenkins and all-guys dorm McMillan Hall is considered a no-no for hired leadership. As for enemy schools, historically, Whitworth has been rivals with both the ne'er-do-well scalawags at Eastern and the snooty sweater-vested snobs over at Gonzaga.

MOST UNDERRATED DORM: Ballyhooed Baldwin-Jenkins gets all the press for being the rowdy, all-freshmen madhouse brimming with wild and crazy guys. But last year, BJ brought neither the noise nor the funk. Instead, Stewart Hall wins as the diamond in the rough. It may not look like much -- it hails from the prison/locker-room school of architecture -- but when it lets its hair down, takes off its glasses and lets its winsome personality shine, it's a shoo-in for Homecoming Queen. Stewart's long list of crappy physical aspects (which includes a massive sewage leak languishing somewhere in the footnotes) merely drives its residents together. They're united -- in some cases, against their own building -- and for that they're stronger.


& lt;li & Play Frisbee. & lt;/li &

& lt;li & Participate in Young Life. & lt;/li &

& lt;li & Become an RA. & lt;/li &

& lt;li & Carry a Nalgene bottle. & lt;/li &

& lt;li & Ride a longboard. & lt;/li &

& lt;li & Wear Northface. & lt;/li &



Cafe Neo

10208 N. Division * 467-5961

98 Twenty

9820 N. Nevada St. * 468-9820


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