Opening Films

by Inlander Staff & r & & r & Failure to Launch -- Tripp (Matthew McConaughey) is handsome, wealthy and too lazy to move out of his parents' house. So his folks hire a "consultant" (Sarah Jessica Parker) to lure him away with a promise of romance. There are plot holes galore, along with by-the-numbers storytelling. But the film manages to remain an enjoyable, if fluffy, romp. (ES) Rated PG-13





The Hills Have Eyes -- They do, we saw them. Deformed irradiated eyes at that. This is the crap-my-car-broke-down story of a group traveling through New Mexico who get stranded in nuclear test central. Deformed citizens quickly descend with, we're led to believe, grisly intentions. Fallout ensues. Rated R





The Libertine -- Johnny Depp has syphilis! Yes, it's the secret fantasy of every homely dude whose significant other ever swooned at Cry Baby, and it also happens to be the plot of The Libertine. It's a crapshoot though -- taking your lover to this will either end his/her love of Depp forever or make it that much stronger. Such is the pull of The Libertine. Rated R





The Shaggy Dog -- In the latest in a series of films that didn't need to be remade, Tim Allen plays the namesake shaggy dog. Or rather, a dude who, through strange and unforeseeable circumstances, becomes a dog. What? No, no, this isn't The Animal, that was Rob Schneider. This looks less funny, if that's possible. Rated PG