Crow Dip

Jeers to the woman who thought the liquor store parking lot an appropriate
place for her little daughter vomit all over the pavement. It was a Tuesday
morning and you stood by and just watched as she bent over and wretched on
what is a very public space. Question: was it you who also decided that
our parking lot was the best spot to toss out a half a loaf of bread? I ask
because just after you left I looked to what would have been the passenger
side of your SUV and witnessed five crows squabbling over the crusty refuse
you evidently no longer wanted. I just stood there dumbfounded by your
total disregard for anyone who might need to walk across the lot the rest
of the day when I noticed one of the crows, a piece of bread in its beak,
hop from your solid dump site to your daughter’s liquid one. I watched in
amazement as he dipped and then swallowed his now moist multi-grain treat!
OK, truth be told I have no idea if you left the bread and I harbor
absolutely no animosity toward you or your daughter. This was such a
bizarre and hilarious thing to have witnessed I just wanted to share and
thought Jeers would be a good place. I hope your little girl is feeling
better. If it helps, you could tell her she made a crow happy and me want
to laugh my backside off. From this day forward I intend to never refer to
vomit as anything other than “Crow Dip.”