THEATER THIS WEEKEND: 9 to 5, Streetcar, The Scarlet Letter, Metamorphoses, "Food" and two hungry kids

Taking over our Spokane stages: Greek gods, Southern hunks and angry secretaries.

It's a drama (with funny bits) about ancient Greek myths. What's that got to do with you?
Well, if you've conquered the problems of vanity, greed, selfishness and desire for revenge, then Metamorphoses won't have much to say to you. The rest of us mere mortals, meanwhile, will not only profit from the show — we'll get to see handsome young men in short-shorts lounging around poolside. There's something about a play set in a swimming pool that's primal — like baptism. Like near-drowning. Like splashing around as if you were 5 years old again. You've got until April 17 to pay your $21 and go see it. This weekend: Thurs-Sat 7:30 pm, Sun 2 pm. Read a preview. At the Civic's downstairs Studio Theater. And our slideshow is coming soon....  

At Gonzaga, Prof. Brian Russo directs Tennessee Williams' A Streetcar Named Desire, which was merely named the greatest American play of all time in a recent poll. When Blanche Dubois puts on airs and threatens to get between sweaty Stanley Kowalski and his wife (her sister) Stella … well, it all ends with a call to the loony bin. Thurs-Sat 7:30 pm, Sun 2 pm. Tickets: $15; $10, students. GU's Magnuson Theater (east end of College Hall), 502 E. Boone Ave. Call 313-6398. (At right, that's Andrew Garcia as Stanley and Katie Haster as Blanche.)

Lake City Playhouse in Coeur d'Alene opens The Scarlet Letter this weekend: Fri-Sat 7:30 pm, Sun 2 pm. (It closes April 3.) In Phyllis Nagy's 1994 adaptation — edgy, feminist, sensual — Pearl is all grown up and acts as the narrator, Hester Prynne is less ashamed than self-assertive, and Hester's husband Roger Chillingworth uses sex to control others. There's devil worship and boot-licking and all kinds of Freudian overtones. Director George Green's production will condense and modernize Nathaniel Hawthorne's novel, just not the way Grandma remembers it. Cynthia Nixon (Sex and the City, Warm Springs, won a Tony for Rabbit Hole in '05) appeared in a Greenwich Village production in '94, reviewed by Ben Brantley. 

9 to 5 sets every woman's revenge fantasy — showing up your arrogant, sexist boss — to music. And every song was written by Dolly Parton herself! Thurs 7:30, Fri 8 pm, Sat 2 pm and 8 pm, Sun 1 pm and 6:30 pm at the INB Center. Tickets: $32-$61. Read a preview and another.

In "Food, Glorious Food," cabaret performer Abbey Crawford will sing songs about, you know, sustenance. Please, ma'am, some more? Sunday, March 27, at 7 pm at the UU Church, 4340 W. Fort George Wright Dr. Call 315-8301. Tickets: $12; $15, at the door. $10, students.

Spokane Children's Theater presents Hansel and Gretel at SFCC's Spartan Theater, Bldg. 5, 3410 W. Fort George Wright Dr. Call 328-4886. Tickets: $12; $10, kids.