by Inlander Staff & r & & r & Annapolis -- James Franco, fresh on the heels of playing a piece of petrified wood (aka the Arthurian hero Tristan), seems to be playing another hard, lifeless substance, this time one that poses as an underclassmen at the US Naval Academy. Tyrese Gibson, in the part he was born to play, is a rough-and-tumble (though physically perfect) drill sergeant who may or may not have a heart of gold. Rated PG-13

Big Mama's House 2 -- Before we learned he was reprising his role in the first Big Mama's House, then seeing a trailer recycling the same situations, sexual follies and fat jokes, we didn't think we could hate Martin Lawrence any more than we already did. We were very, very wrong. Rated PG-13

Brokeback Mountain -- Everybody's talking about "the gay cowboy movie," with Jake Gyllenhaal and Heath Ledger as longtime lovers who try to keep the secret from their wives. Most folks are saying good things about Ang Lee's first film since Hulk. But the film runs too slow, and the story doesn't offer enough explanation of motivation. Beautiful scenery and a great performance by Michelle Williams really isn't enough. And Gyllenhaal's mustache looks ridiculous. (ES) Rated R

The Chronicles of Narnia: The Lion, the Witch and the Wardrobe -- The C.S. Lewis novel has its charm and fantastical imagery intact, although, happily, the religious overtones are now undertoned. During World War II, four siblings are sent to the British countryside for safety, where they find a portal to another world: the wintry land of Narnia. They must come together as a unit, join forces with magical creatures and defeat a wicked queen (Tilda Swinton). Nicely done, for all ages. (ES) Rated PG

Curious George -- The simple and gentle kiddie books have gone even simpler and gentler in this flatly animated film adaptation that's geared toward viewers who are too young to be brought to a movie theater. The Man in the Yellow Hat (voice of Will Ferrell) goes to Africa to find a museum-worthy relic and is followed back to New York by the frisky but lonely monkey, and all sorts of adventures ensue -- none of which will hold the attention of anyone older than 5. This will work far better as a baby-sitter on DVD. (ES) Rated G

Final Destination 3 -- Anyone who said love's a bitch hasn't met fate. Same conceit at work here, kids. Fate -- or Death, or whatever -- meant to kill everyone onboard a rollercoaster, but some people survived, so now the disembodied hand of Fate/Death has to knock them off one by one, and it's up to a plucky group of kids to stop it. You know what they say: Third time's a suck-fest. Rated R

Firewall -- Harrison Ford runs all sorts of security systems at his bank and is the one picked by nasty Paul Bettany and his gang of techno thieves -- who have kidnapped his family -- to bypass those systems ands show them the money. The whole plot seems lifted from The Friends of Eddie Coyle, and while there are some good twists, we've seen Ford and others do this sort of thing before. (ES) Rated PG-13

Forces of Nature -- Showcasing the awesome spectacle of earthquakes, volcanoes, and severe storms as we follow scientists on their quests to understand how these natural disasters are triggered. Narrated by Kevin Bacon! Unrated

Fun with Dick and Jane -- What do you do when the company you work for turns out to be run by a bunch of criminals? Newly unemployed Jim Carrey decides to join the fun, and turns to a life of crime to maintain his little slice of the American Dream. Also stars Tea Leoni and Angie Harmon. Rated PG-13

Glory Road -- Glory Road tells the story of the first all-black starting lineup of basketball players in a major-college championship game, at Texas Western College in 1966. The team was led by their groundbreaking yet humble coach Don Haskins (Josh Lucas, Undertow). Debut director James Gartner struggles with solidifying the film's socially explosive period aspects against the exacting demands of recreating a season's worth of hair-raising basketball games surging toward the 1966 NCAA tournament. (CS) Rated PG

Harry Potter and the Goblet of Fire -- Harry and friends return for another term at Hogwarts, and Harry somehow becomes a contestant in the dangerous and exciting Triwizard Tournament. Director Mike Newell and entire-series writer Steve Kloves add new dimensions to the story, with more emotional punch and some maturing (sexual awakening?) of the young wizards. This fourth installment is the most fun and the scariest. Brendan Gleeson steals the show as "Mad-Eye." (ES) Rated PG-13

Hoodwinked! -- It's the story of Little Red Riding Hood told from many different angles, none of which look very funny. Rated PG

Magnificent Desolation -- Only 12 people have walked on the moon, but now IMAX is proclaiming that you'll be number 13. You won't really be on the moon, just leaning back a little in your chair, gazing up at the moon's desolate vistas projected on a massive format screen. This is bound to be good. Tom Hanks produced it, and he doesn't put his name on bad movies. Unrated

The Matador -- Pierce Brosnan has gotten typecast big-time post-Bond. Luckily he's always found films with an interesting angle on the man-of-intrigue thing. Tailor of Panama was a good example. The Matador looks to be as well. Brosnan is an aging assassin who helps an out-of-sorts everyman (Greg Kinnear) get a job he really needs by killing off the other applicants. But then Brosnan blows a different hit, and suddenly he needs a favor of his own. Rated R

Memoirs of a Geisha -- While they are startling initially, director Rob Marshall's images quickly begin to fall flat. Perhaps the gradual loss of this highly symbolic visual language pantomimes the crumble of Imperial Japan, which was symbol-rich itself. No, these uninspired later scenes more closely parallel the audience's realization that the visual grandeur of Geisha's first two acts hinted at a depth of narrative that just doesn't exist. (LB) Rated PG-13

Nanny McPhee -- Emma Thompson gets ultra-ugly while Colin Firth stays super-repressed and painfully British in the precocious Nanny McPhee. Humans are comparing this to Mary Poppins -- and not just that dullard Gene Shalit. Rated PG

The New World -- Director Terrence Malik can't manage to write into the cracks and crevices of any of these characters -- not just John Smith (Colin Farrell) but Pocohontas (Q'Orianka Kilcher) herself. Like some historical bas-relief, it has more depth than a sketch but less than a sculpture. The New World is still a good film, and a beautiful one, it's just a little tragic, muted and corrupt. Making it a metephor for the historical realities it references (LB) Rated PG-13

Pink Panther -- Remake of the Peter Sellers classic Francophone-lampooning slap-stick-a-thon about a stolen pink diamond. If anyone was going to try to reprise the role of Jacques Clouseau, we'd have wanted it to be Steve Martin. That doesn't mean it's going to be good, though. Rated PG

Something New -- What Happens when you've written Films about rich white people dating poor black people from every conceivable angle? You switch race roles! Sanaa Lathan and Simon Baker star in this tale of a rich black chick whol slums with her white gardener. Reeks of progress. Rated PG 13

Underworld: Evolution -- If we didn't have "turkey" rating here, I would label this sequel to Underworld a dog -- or is it a wolf? A big bad wolf? Kate Beckinsale returns as sultry but sullen Selene, a vampire who goes about killing werewolves over the centuries. But this time, she's dealing with flashbacks to the year 1202, as well as romantic entanglement with a modern-day hybrid of werewolf and human (Scott Speedman). The main problems include too much plotting, overuse of blood and utter incomprehensibility. (ES) Rated R

Walk the Line -- Biopics come in two distinct flavors, good and bad. The good are measured and unsensationalized, focusing on the person more than his or her celebrity, engaging and salacious as those might be. Walk The Line -- directed by James Mangold and starring Joaquin Phoenix as Johnny Cash and Reese Witherspoon as June Carter Cash -- is one of the good ones. (LB) Rated PG-13

When a Stranger Calls -- A remaking of the 1979 semi-clasic of the same name, When a Stranger Calls is the kind of a film you know about even if you haven't seen it because it has one of those great lines that quickly becomes a pop touchstone. Calling 91 about harassing phone calls, the policeman on the other end and gasps, "It's coming from inside the house." Chilling. Whether or not you can write an whole movie around a single line of dialogue remains to be seen. Rated PG 13

Summer Parkways @ South Hill

Through June 20
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