What my obsession with bookkeeping did for my brain in tumultuous times

click to enlarge What my obsession with bookkeeping did for my brain in tumultuous times
Spreadsheets — a key to logging your life.

I have a spreadsheet or app for almost everything that occurs in my daily life that is trackable. This includes what books I read, what music I listen to and my migraine headaches, to name a few examples.

During the lockdown of March 2020, I decided to start writing down every book I read during my time inside. That quickly evolved into creating a spreadsheet with even more information. I kept track of the title, the author, the genre, where I purchased books and how much they cost, the number of pages in the book and, of course, my rating on a five-star scale.

The tracking was something uniquely my own, something I could control when I had no control of the world around me. I was scared of the state of things, I didn't want to get sick. Tracking took my mind off of things.

The tracking progressed past books and into the realm of music.

I have a vast collection of vinyl records and CDs that are my pride and joy. From the Star Wars soundtrack to Elliott Smith, I've got it all. But that got me thinking: Which artists/albums do I listen to the most? What are my most played songs? Does the data accurately portray my love for BTS? If not, I've gotta fix that.

I started using an app called Last.fm to compile my music listening habits into easy-to-digest reports and graphs. (Spoiler alert: The data does accurately portray my love of BTS. They have about 10,000 lifetime plays and a spot as my No. 1 artist of all time compared to my No. 2 most-played artist, Phoebe Bridgers, who only has 1,500 lifetime plays.)

At the beginning of 2022, I was still afraid, but life had to go on at some point. I was back at in-person classes and work was back to pre-pandemic normalcy. I looked at my various spreadsheets and apps at the start of the new year. The information I'd so carefully collected was, digitally, collecting dust. I hadn't touched my spreadsheets in months.

When I scrolled through the list of books I read in 2020, a collection of T.S. Eliot poems stood out to me. I remember reading the Eliot poem "The Love Song of J. Alfred Prufrock" after logging off of my first college class via Zoom ever.

"Let us go then, you and I, / When the evening is spread out against the sky / Like a patient etherized upon a table; / Let us go, through certain half-deserted streets..."

But I couldn't go anywhere because my mind wouldn't let go of the horror I felt at that moment. I couldn't walk through the "half-deserted streets" of my hometown and see the carnage that a pandemic had done to the lively downtown area.

When I look at my 2022 reading log, I don't see many entries. Only 18 this year so far. I'm reminded of how much life has changed. I'm too busy to read 52 books in a year now.

Those spreadsheets serve as time capsules that remind me of when life was hardly life at all. They show me that perseverance is key and that I can reach goals even in the most difficult of times. (And that getting vaccinated and being able to go to bookstores again really did a number on my wallet.)

Though my tracking is unconventional, it's been cathartic. I'm grateful to the habit for keeping me level-headed even when the world seemed to be crumbling down around me.

To quote Charles Dickens: "I have been bent and broken, but — I hope — into a better shape." ♦

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Madison Pearson

Madison Pearson is the Inlander’s Listings Editor and Digital Lead, managing the publication’s calendar of events, website and social media pages. She serves as editor of the annual Summer Camps Guide and regularly contributes to the Inlander's Arts & Culture and Music sections. Madison is a lifelong resident...