The Borowitz Report

by Andy Borowitz & r & Bush Proproses Moving U.S. Capital to Idaho & r & Idaho, the state that currently gives President George W. Bush his highest approval rating in the nation, could soon be getting something in return as the president recently proposed moving the nation's capital to Idaho for the remainder of his second term. Mr. Bush used a speech in Boise to float the idea of moving the nation's center of government from Washington, D.C., to the Gem State.


"I'll tell you this," Mr. Bush told the cheering crowd. "I wouldn't mind going back to Washington so much if Washington were in Idaho."


While some in the audience first thought Mr. Bush was suffering from a bout of geographic confusion, he soon made it clear that he was actually proposing moving the federal government to Idaho, a decision that could mean trillions of dollars to the state, business leaders say.


But Dr. Charles Nesvig, professor of political science at the University of Minnesota, believes that moving the nation's capital from Washington to Idaho could hold hidden perils for Mr. Bush. "Right now, Idaho loves Bush, but Bush is almost never there," Dr. Nesvig said. "There's a possibility that once Bush is in Idaho a whole lot, Idaho won't like him nearly so much.


But Dr. Nesvig says there could be a silver lining to such a scenario: "Once President Bush realizes that Idaho is where he has to go to work every day, he probably won't be there that much, especially in the summer."


Elsewhere, domestic diva Martha Stewart announced that instead of saying "You're fired" on her new spin-off of The Apprentice, she would hold up a kitchen timer and go "ding."





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