Monday, July 23, 2012

Ichiro is now a Yankee

Posted By on Mon, Jul 23, 2012 at 5:06 PM

For the past 10 years, its become increasingly difficult to remain a Mariners fan. 

Now, it's really, really hard. The team just announced that they have traded their best outfielder, a future hall of famer and the most famous guy in Seattle to the damn New York Yankees.

That's right. Ichiro -- the guy so good he doesn't need a last name -- now plays for the freaking New York Yankees.

Hold on, allow me to clean the vomit off my computer.

OK, I'm back. It sounds like Ichiro was asking for the trade, but come on Mariners. Ichiro? And to the putrid collection of jerks that make up the Yankees? Really? 

And what did the Mariners, infamous for making boneheaded mid-seasons trades such as this, get in return? Oh, just a couple of pitchers who have a combined ZERO major league wins. I'd name there, here but it doesn't matter. You've never heard of 'em.

Why would a team with the lowest home batting average in all of baseball want a couple of unproven pitchers?

Yeah, I know. You're probably saying things like "Who cares? Ichiro is getting old?""He's only batting .260 something." "What's an Ichiro?" "He wanted to leave anyway."

Well, friend, that .260 is still the best the Mariners had. But most importantly, he was a Northwest icon who brought people out to the games. A fan favorite, Ichiro's trade also broke more than a few hearts.

Here's the kicker though: The Mariners play the Yankees tonight. In Seattle. And Ichiro is batting eighth...for the Yankees."

He just won't look right in pinstripes. 

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About The Author

Mike Bookey

Mike Bookey was the culture editor for The Inlander from 2012-2016. He previously held the same position at The Source Weekly in Bend, Ore.